Judgement and Abandonment
Dear Diary
Today I let go of the emotion of judgement and abandonment.
What started as a fun thing just to see how good my memory is to remember started to get in my head and I did not even realize when it turned to judgement. As you know everything we experience from other people is either because we are doing it to others or doing it to ourselves. I experianced judgement for myself at the gym. It caught me as a surprise and completely unexpected. I obviously was offended and after my ego settled I observed what was going on. Very soon it was made clear to me it was judgement. I didnt realize I was doing it and then a little bit of thinking made it evident that me looking at people and checking my memory to see what each body shape represented resulted in me attracting judgement. Well that was easy to let go because I know I shouldnt be doing that as we all are on a journey to become whatever we are meant to be. The harder one was abandonment.
As far as I can remember I suffered from abandonment issues. Someone not calling me or messaging me back – abandonment. Some one ignoring me – abandonment. it triggered me to nth degree and upset me. Since I felt deeply about it, surely I attracted it often from friends and family.